Letting it go...

Has never been easy.

It takes time, it takes hardship to do this.

To let you go for real, for good

Is a big, bold, and a very cold step to do so.

Its beneficial, it is logical.

Not to think of you again, to let you go for good.

I so want to do so..

If only.

I can find a guy like you someday.

A selfless, compassionate guy who would want to do things for the others

Who feels how that I have felt

And have a passion to do so- working into the lives of people

Lighting up their lives, bit by bit

If only.

A guy is like you.

I would have forgotten about you, and how that I have felt so long ago.

But I haven't.

Lord,

Help me.

To do this.

To let it go,

For good.

And for real.

Never to turn back.

If it is Your will.

Amen.

If I don't care,

I should be enjoying my life right now.

I really wonder, how can many others be happy

When the so many more others are still suffering?

Lord,

Answer me.






Because I really want to stop this.

Step by step,

Bold by bold.

I try.

Pain. Dryness. Sadness.

Seeing real life documentaries,

Knowing that many others are in pain.