The rain...

Falls so silently unto the earth below.

Kissing the people, the shelters, roads and roofs nearby

As it cools your temper, your anxiety and stress

Making you feel and think so differently again.

The Running Man

Having the 5th-60th episodes all in my laptop!

HAHA.

So good. To see famous adults all acting like kids. 

Guess that's the part which made it so famous.

Song Joong Ki!!!!:D

Hearts and loves!

To my new favourite korean actor.

So humble, so smart and sooooo cute.

Love him love him love him so so much!!

Watching the new episode The Innocent Man in KBS World, every Weds and Thurs by 9pm.

Falling in love with him

Your Choice

Feeling sad or happy, it's you who determines it.

Not circumstances.

Sometimes...

I wish life was all so beautiful. Just like the Garden of Eden for Adam and Eve before everything bad started.

But i wonder, how can we humans grow with a life of heaven like that. To be more matured, loving, forgiving, strong and persistent till the end.

If we humans were to be given a life like that, we would never learn how to forgive and love a person all over again. We would just be treating the person good 'cause the person treated us good.

We would never treasure a life that is called life. A life so easy will make us take advantage of it, and we may even complain all the more since we haven't known what that is called as difficulty.

And our thinking will just be like a child's, never growing up to feel for others and to think abstractly like an adult. To be responsible for our past actions and to learn from mistakes.

A life of challenges, sweat and bittersweet memories... A life of risk takings, joy and sorrow, success and failures. A life that is truly called as life.

Some people gave up... and killed themselves.
They didn't give up hope in life. They gave up hope in themselves.

I m sorry.

I don't know whether are you reading this or not... I don't have high expectations.

But one thing, I m really sorry. About how i treated you last time, only now when i looked back and recall then did i found myself being such a jerk towards you. 'Cause you were always so good towards me. Using your terms, i was really bad. To how you treated me, what i did was nothing.

I know that i hurted you alot... i wish i can carry the pain. I have to be responsible for what i have done, my stupid ignorance. And even when i m really thankful, i don't know how to express out myself. I just don't know how to express out myself, it's not that i m not grateful for the so many things that you have done for me, and that you have helped me alot, i just wanna say.. thanks. And i mean it.

Thanks. For helping me so much. Thankful for you as a friend.

I should care more about you, in the least. Because this is what that you deserve. If you are not reading this it's ok. I don't expect you to stalk me anyway. But if you are... here it is. This comes from deep inside of my heart. And it's good to let me go too... there is a better girl out there, just waiting for you.

A girl who will be more loving, patient, quiet, submissive and gentle, who suits you.

:) All the best.

It has been a long while

Since i have stopped work in Domino's for the coming exams. Missing the environment... but somehow i fear gossips will happen again. Just don't want it to happen. Plain useless worries and phobias which i need to get rid of that's all.

Lord...

I feel lonely.

But it's my own fault.

I will improve to be a better person in every way.

Thank you, Lord, because we humans learn best through trials and difficulties.

Amen.

YAY!:D

They are fine again. :)

Everything that has happened becomes like a shadow.

Everything- the setbacks, the memories, the traumas that happened in January, the peer pressure has just begun to fade away in my life.

And mostly, them. They seem so much smaller now. Suddenly my life doesn't evolve around them anymore. My life is filled with laughter, new experiences, new learning, new exposure... a whole new life.

Those colleagues... i love them. Always trying to make me laugh, and we kept on teasing and concerning for one another... feel the warmth there, it's indescribable.

Driving too... can't help laughing at my stupid mistakes and the annoyed look from the other drivers every time when my car engine just went off again! :D
Sooner or later, i will be driving myself to work in the ATSA architecture firm... if God allows this blessing to be poured upon me. And driving my friends here and there too, i love it!!

Lord... thank You so much for Your blessings. I believe that i m getting my bit of an emotional rest now, it is good for my health. Thank you so much, Lord. The more we ponder upon that it's how much God loves us, and not how much we love him that matters, the more we realized that we are so being loved... and we are found worthy, we are accepted unconditionally. Amen.

I wanted so much to help them, Lord. To help them get to know about the ATSA architects, which got the BCI Asia Top 10 Awards 2012 and is reachable as it is found in Taman Tun Dr. Ismail, Kuala Lumpur. To be interns there, we can learn so much in there and help in our university career and deduct the working period for our degree year when it gets too hectic.

I really want to help... but how to reach out for them? How? There must be some socializing methods to be polished so i can talk to them properly and nicely. And for the communication barrier between us to be removed.

Like

Can make friends easily

Improve relationships

Enjoy much and be enjoyed with friends or lovers

But LOVE...

Is beautiful, sweet, cherishing, promising.

Love can change things. Like improves, BUT LOVE CHANGES.

Love

Cherishes the heart

Forgive past wrongs

Looks into the new

Always putting hope in the person

Never giving up

Gentle and patiently waiting

For the person to come back to oneself again.



Love is awesome.

:)... Mummy is coming back.

Sooner or later, it is call a complete home again, a family reunited.

I close my eyes...

And i can see you smile. :)

Life is so beautiful

Only with the right people. Although it seems so few...

But we have enjoyed so much with one another.

Loving my new friends, my new job, my new colleagues, my managers, my life :))

God has blessed me so much after the conflict.

And i m so much happier than before.

Lord, thank you... so much. For Your blessings are many, and You add no sorrow unto it.

Thank you so much for loving me for just being me.

Going for steamboat with Clarence and the church gang again! :D

Really happy 'cause i get to see TY again, the friend who always sticks close to me no matter what happens.

Love everyone in my life~~~ Life is so enjoyable. If only you try seeing it that way.

And my manager is so understanding, my job so fun and relaxing.

Free pizzas for all to eat, free chicken crumbs when packaging it... free slices of pineapple and cheese...

Every time when i m late or can't make it to work, they will just say it's ok that's all.

Breathe in... and sigh. Life's great. Anti- stress... just for now. Enjoying the time while it lasts.

After awhile, trials and difficulties will come again. Just having some emotional rest for now.

Mum and dad...

I have grown up so much in your love, your care and your joy...

It's time to repay back.

I will make you proud.

TT

Enjoy the feeling of sadness.

Sadness is not sorrow. It is a conviction which helps you to feel more for people.

Feel the blues... breathe in the night air and exhale.

Life is perfect if you regard it to be. If you have low expectations and aim high for it.

As quoted by Taylor Swift. Aim high, expect low. Then you can wake up every morning with a huge smile on your face. Because you know you succeed.

Just back from work in Domino's again.

Feel so loved.

Just like a small family, we joked and teased each other and then burst out laughing

Everyone in good mood, high spirits to serve one another and the customers.

This is what i call as a dream job. :)

Sweet, easy and fun.

Although i don't really understand Malay fluently, but we get to communicate so easily.

Got a real taste of what a majority Malay environment tastes like ;D

And i love it.

All music which comforts the soul :)

Chopin

Yiruma

Daily Bread Instrumental Music

1990's love songs

Hillsongs to make you joyful

Planetshakers to make you feel like jumping

LOVE THEM ALL!!!!

I cried.

Because i remembered all of the bittersweet memories we shared.

The times spent in Kuala Kangsar, the times spent just drawing with you guys...

was awesome. And unforgettable.

Looking back, i really wonder why

Why do we have to end up being like this? Two parties ignoring and being neutral to one another.

Between us is only the furthest, a cold hi and bye. Unemotional. A heartbreak. Because none of us have ever wanted to end up like this.

If just one of us choose to humble ourselves and start minor talks with another, then things may be improving.

But now the both parties are already so cold towards each other, and another finds the other irritating.

So... let it be it. And just let it go. 'Cause it's not important to get recognition in every places that you go anyway. Let this just be a training ground for me, for me to be a more humble and sociable and less self-centered person. That's all. Full stop.

...

I really do miss you guys... but whether do you have the same feeling back is just another thing.

Emos.

Is a good, relaxed, self- evaluation feeling.

The feeling which satisfies you in a way that you know why people treats you in a different manner
and how you are perceived, which your true self.

Then you know, and then you understand.

The best time to look out of your room window or the night sky, and start describing your feelings with words, with poems and drawings.

Draw your feelings out, whatever it takes and be brave about it.

Somehow... no matter how terrible the drawing is, you will feel satisfied. Because you are your only judge, and you have finally released out your feelings successfully.

Yup, sure. Even this is labeled as success already.

'Cause success is perceived as what you think it is, not as how other people view it to be.

It comes out from the bottom of heart... satisfaction, disappointment, and everything that you feel, you are the one who determines it.

You chose to be happy. You make it. And the people whom you love and loves you will be happy too.

You choose to be sad, ok just go with it. No one will pity you anyway, only yourself.

You choose to put the fault in others. So what, you think they can improve?
People change when you start changing yourself, and when they see you as an inspiration. So do it kay.

You choose to be good and peaceful. You choose to love others even if they don't love you back.

All these are not by feelings, but by decisions. You choose, you improve. That's all.

So which one will you choose? It determines you.

Looper

Was thrilling. But too cruel.

Enjoyed so much the time spent with Sin Yong and Teik Yin!:D

It has been such a long time since we old friends have met up, and really looking forward for another one.

Sometimes looking up the sad night sky...

I just want to cry and cry and cry.

Life is never perfect. No one says it is.

So that's how we humans can improve and mold each other up into a better person.

Feeling lonely. But that's normal. Just don't wallow into self- pity.

Whenever we have much to say but just can't tell, we will cry.

To release ourselves, and to feel better.

God has given us just one life... so just enjoy it the best we can.

It's not about how much that we love God, but about how much that God loves us.

Indulge in it. It's about how much God loves us.

Amazing, eh? Suddenly you feel protected. Suddenly you feel that you don't have to serve him because you supposed to do so, but because of love. Suddenly you don't feel condemned or obliged anymore, because it's how God loves us, so we don't have to get out of our way to do something just to please Him.

Because He sees the heart. :)

What else can i do?

I have already said sorry. The best thing to do next is to just ignore you, that's it.

Architecture.

Does it really suit me?

Yeah, i m truly enjoying the things which i m learning and doing.

It stimulates me into such a creative mindset, to think out of the norm, yadda yadda yadda

Okay everything is fine... except for with some of my foundation course mates. But it's not their fault 'cause i was proud to them and i have to change myself. And to think for other people too.

Wondering what will happen if i m taking up Mass Communication now.

Will i get a better chance of standing, and score better and make new friends who are more like me, with the same mindset?

Maybe.

It's good that i have never regretted taking up this Architecture course. Just liking everything that i m doing.
And after awhile this like will turn into love.

Architecture.

Has got to do with inventing, creating, logical thinking, idea-ing, psychology, environment and science, everything that i like.

Okay... So stay put in here for now. 'Cause the other courses are not much better anyway, and my capability  is in it. The satisfaction of people living in the building i have designed... sounds great. The salary too... is awesome. Better than a journalist's. So what am i wondering here and there for?

Just concentrate la, and you can make it through. Don't let people stop you from being successful, but let people criticize and change you inside out. To be the person whom God will want you to be. To be just like Him. Amen!:))

English Communication Class

Is the place which makes me feel the most lonely.

Everyone is laughing with one another, and i m the only serious one among them who finds it not funny.

At least i tried to.

NVM, it only happens once per week. So JYs in it. 

Having so many things inside me which is hard to release out... without the right people

But feel so happy whenever i m with him, don't need anyone else anymore. Just hoping that we can have the chance to spend more time together, and to hang out. 

And just hope that one day he will come to church also. 

Amen. :)